Seasons of Limbo

by Bomethius

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1.
Traffic 03:20
When the traffic all turned red And someone was most certainly dead We all stopped just to catch a glimpse Of the one who startled our trance We ignored you alive But now we want a view Just some little clue Of what’s waiting Around the bend I have a feeling It might look like you When the sirens come for you Will you feel like The other victims do When the sirens come for you Will you feel like The other victims too Everyone’s hurting all the same But those on the street are more plain Suicides and smiles but life remains A pain that can’t be tamed We ignored you alive But now we want a view Just some little clue Of what’s waiting Around the bend I have a feeling It might look like you When the sirens come for you Will you feel like The other victims do When the sirens come for you Will you feel like The other victims too
2.
As Yourself 03:03
Let’s retire early on in our thirties Like Elliott Smith and Jesus The anthem of our party will be “Just murder me.” Scratching at your scalp Trying to make sense of it all But the warmth of reason She won’t take your call You’re out on your own Who will forgive this loan If only you’d known Just a little before Isn’t that just the way? You sell yourself to yourself to pay For the chance to say with the crowd “Just murder me.” Sure there’s no one else to blame But all the same I’ve been called to love you Me myself someway And the warmth of love She’s gone away And the warmth of reason Did the same Scratching at my scalp Trying to make sense of it all Won’t anyone take my call Won’t anyone take my call
3.
A Close Call 03:35
I thought we had more time than this Maybe a score of years to find our balance The day we crossed our lines The day we said goodbye was hello To regret and shame and worry We used to walk about In conversation’s sound Exchanging our anxieties A wound and a gift It will level and lift To love and be loved Is to lose When we live in fear Joy and pain feel the same Both end in tears Both end in tears Like a cancer our distance grew We would visit but I didn’t like you Liking stuff is easy And I think I put it first Forgive me mother Let’s do something that hurts A close call or the end I hope there’s still time to mend What was broken through misuse When we live in fear Joy and pain feel the same Both end in tears Both end in tears
4.
By a pool reclining Just our friends, you and me But it’s so far away I’m overcome thinking Goodbye Covid-19 We thought you’d play the piano And they that I would hold a violin Just when I think we know the answer Then it looks like goodbye, cried Covid-19 Grandpa this is serious Please cancel your flight This isn’t the flu, and no it’s not cancer Let’s not say goodbye because of Covid-19 The parks are all closed No matter we’ll be married where we are Everything’s looming around the corner But we won’t say goodbye, Covid-19 We’ll meet again soon I can’t say when or where But when we do, I’ll hug you a bit longer And we won’t say goodbye because of Covid-19
5.
I'm Trying 05:12
There’s a part of me Living in your sigh Because I know I’m still Working through lies And I’m scared you’ll find me Living here And I’m scared you’ll wonder About what’s driving my tears What’s driving my tears But I’m trying Oh Lord, I’m trying I’m trying To be true So I’ll face myself Cast off my shame And I’ll set aside The weights of my past life When my dreams turn to nightmares And the candle’s run out Who will you run to When there’s rain in the clouds When there’s rain in the clouds I’m trying Oh Lord I’m trying I’m trying To be true
6.
7.
Nothing 03:48
It’s time for a nap, drink your stough Are you finished crying or haven’t you had enough? To decide your fate For the moment you’re awake Did we really have to Go and raise the stakes? Our bodies will ask What our minds refuse Questions in the air Tearing out your hair Just to see if anybody cares Imbibe your fear Let others draw near Don’t kick them out The friends you hold dear Even when I’m alone And my conscience is stoned Where’s the redemption In the verses I’ve on loan Our bodies will ask What our minds refuse Questions in the air Tearing out your hair Just to see if anybody cares Turn these many talents into one Thousands of burning souls in a river of love A river of love
8.
Death was knocking on our door To remind us that he’s waiting Wailing through the sirens Whistling down the alleys These riddles in the dark As all the trees fall in the parks Lightning’s running through the clouds Tornados in Dallas are touching down To spend a perfect day together But end it so far apart You left these lives scattered and bound Tornados in Dallas are touching down The summer’s turned to frosted roses And the petals still born to fall Lord come down as something common Make thin spots of us all Make the ordinary sacred In this laughter and the songs Reveal some light in this darkness Help us just to get along Help us just to get along
9.
We worked so hard not to shout To control our thoughts and our words in it all I can’t remember everything that was once known But you, you oughta know, What we’ve been through I just can’t believe I found you roaming these halls How could a pretty thing like you come here in fall? We walked these paths and played in these keys We knew all those people and got tangled All up in their schemes There wasn’t much to hold onto And I’d had enough of everything but you This place is boring a hole in my head And I know I’ve earned enough to be happy For the rest of my life But it’s not because of them or their tyranny And their costs, their demands for me to show up And pay attention to their wants and their designs Cuz, I found you, I found you, You’re all I’ll need from school
10.
Free me from my wanton lust It seems I’m the only one that I can’t trust Lord give me the strength that I can’t find Weigh me down against what’s in my mind Oh and Lord shake my spirit Oh and Lord make me feel it Behind Your grave and mercy I can’t hide It’s not right for me, here on the inside If those eyes really knew me Would they smile to see me? Would you smile to see me? Fill my life with yearning for your eyes Fixed on you we’re all about the same size Though we hurt ourselves and others Victim and victimizer We’re all the same size Oh and Lord shake my spirit Oh and Lord make me fear it
11.
I’m a bit tired of all the misunderstandings The quizzical looks and the hurt feelings Why can’t we say what we mean and mean what we say Can’t we just smile through our rainy days? Let’s calm down and take it all less serious Especially what they’ve told us to believe God has a sense of humor, or well I guess he better Why else would he make you and me? Where are my people? Where are my people? Where are my people? Where are my people? I just can’t find my people I just can’t find my people I don’t seem to belong Ever since I left home Don’t seem to belong Ever since I left home I’m just going home for Christmas Though it seems that they hate me there too But unlike the rest, they have some pretty good reasons I may not share them, but sometimes I hate me too I want to laugh ‘til I cry And cry ‘til I laugh And do it all again We want to laugh ‘til we cry And cry ‘til we laugh And do it all again Where are my people? These are my people? But I don’t seem to belong Ever since I left home Where are my people? These are my people? But I don’t seem to belong Ever since I left home I don’t seem to belong Ever since I left home I don’t seem to belong Ever since I left home

credits

released March 26, 2021

Special thanks to:

Cynphia for being my long-suffering muse.

Travis Carroll for 1) being the first line of defense against my innermost temptation to produce mediocrity, and 2) for all the musical additions you made to this album. Your bass parts were fun, and your vocals were in tune and stirring. I pray that you remain steadfast in your pursuit, appraisal, and appreciation of The Good unto your dying day.

Matt Shaw for your time, fantastic performances, and graciousness in dealing with my inexhaustible indecision and inexorable need for control. I need help; I’m sorry.

Jeff Tullis for the heckin’ incredible bass part on “All I’ll Need.” You really went off on that. I guess you kinda went off on all of your bass parts. Huh. Wanna be friends? Or like do an entire album of dueling acoustic jazzy numbers or something?

Luke Blase for your outstanding guitar work. Each track demanded a very different thing and you went above and beyond. Looking forward to working together again!

Ricky Roshell for playing that sax solo on “All I’ll Need.” Your solos are an inspiration. Every and any time we get to collaborate it is an absolute joy — hoping for more “music- ing” together down the road!

Caroline Davis for offering your beautiful voice on “I’m Trying.” I look forward to collaborating on future projects!

Chris Stubblefield for the absurdity that is your trumpet performance on “As Yourself.” I look forward to our next project together with the kind of joyous fervor and expectation that cannot be overstated.

Aaron Hauser for throwing together those cello parts. Very few, if anyone at all, will ever appreciate how demanding it was to play (in tune!) on “I’m Trying,” and I owe a lot of that to how well you performed your parts. Hope we can work together again!

Phil Hodges for your beautiful playing, time, friendship, and support. You brought some of my favorite moments to this album, and I’m so glad you were willing to play on it.

Michael Minkoff for your criticism, honesty, charity, encouragement, and love. If Travis is the first line of defense against my mediocrity, you are certainly the first line of attack, and I appreciate it ever so much. I hope we continue to grow closer and work together in the coming years. Also your drums on Tornados in Dallas really made that track work — heckin’ super, broh!

Ben Hodges for the donation of your beautiful script on
the front cover. In the past you’ve only written about my albums, but this time you literally wrote on my album. Excited to see what you do with the next one!

Music and Lyrics Written, Produced, Mixed, and Mastered by Jonathan Hodges in a little apartment in East Dallas.

Luke Blase was Produced and Recorded by Jeremy Nichols, Ben Cato, and Charlie Pinkard for tracks 1, 2, and 5; and Produced and Recorded by Collin Brown for track 7.

The intonation issues on this album exist for the sole purpose of pissing off Dr. Mead.

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Bomethius Dallas, Texas

Bomethius is the alter ego recording alias of Jonathan Hodges (b. 10-10-96), a Dallas based musician. An accomplished violinist, Hodges started studying music at age 3. Addressing doubts, fears, and disappointments from his own personal experience, Hodges recorded the first two Bomethius albums alone in his bathroom and quickly developed a unique baroque pop sound informed by melancholy, and wit. ... more

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